Generic Structure: My Favorite Laptop : Introduction : Body

Sample 2

My Favorite Laptop

I am always use this thing. I can bring this thing everywhere. I always bring this thing when I go to campus. Usually, I bring this thing to preservation in my class. This is my favorite thing that I have it. The thing is laptop.

My lovely laptop never far away from me. This thing always I bring. Laptop is usefull thing that I have. It can help me to do my assignment. Especially assignment from my class. Sometimes, I write it in Microsoft Windows or Microsoft Excel. And than, I can show my work in front of the class with the program. Beside that, my laptop can bring many information that I need. Usually, I use Internet to my laptop. In internet, there are many knowledge and information. So, I can add the information to my assignment. Especially I use google to search it. In there I can find many information. I just write what I want and click search. So many choice I can put it to my assignment. Beside that, I can chatting with someone and make a new friends. The important way is I can improve my language when I meet aboard people I can know about they culture and I can find many vocab to improve my language. After that, I can play games in my laptop. Sometimes, I play the sims in my laptop. The game is about peoplewho work and their life.

So, I decided my laptop as my favorite thing. Many usefull I can get it from it. And than. Important way is I can bring to everywhere.

The Generic Structure

Introduction

In the first paragraph, the writer introduced the object he is going to describe by stating his habits he usually did with the object. It is such an unusual way of developing introduction paragraph to gain the readers curiosity. However, the student misses a beginning (introduction) because she uses sentences that lead the readers to play such a guessing game.

There is only one body paragraph in this composition stated in the second paragraph. The student uses more than an idea organized into a paragraph. Actually, in this paragraph, the writer is going to describe the usefulness of his laptop. However, he tends to describe the function of laptop generally without specific descriptions which differentiate his laptop with other people laptop as shown in the underlined sentences.

Moreover, the other sentences in italic writing explain more about the usefulness of the internet. He makes it out of the main idea itself. He changes the focus of the paragraph into a new other idea about the internet.

So, I decided my laptop as my favorite thing. Many usefull I can get it from it. And than. Important way is I can bring to everywhere. (Third paragraph)

In the third paragraph, he concluded his composition in a very simple ending paragraph without including some details about the laptop as mentioned in the previous paragraphs.

Language Features

a. The Use of Simple Present Tense

The sentence construction of this descriptive composition uses specific tense which is simple present tense. Here are the examples:

- This thing always I bring.

- It can help me to do my assignment.

- Usually, I use Internet to my laptop.

Nevertheless, the writer uses past tense in one of the sentences stated in the conclusion paragraph. (So, I decided my laptop as my favorite thing.)

b. Word choice of sensory words and figurative language

The characteristic of descriptive composition is the use of sensory words in form of adjective to describe the ideas. Nevertheless, there is only an adjective described about the laptop. It can be seen from the second paragraph, “Laptop is usefull thing that I have”. What the writer means is that laptop, a useful thing that he has. It is not such a sensory word so that he describes it generally. He composes it like a report composition, not a descriptive composition.

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